In this journey of life, do you define your journey or does the journey define you ?

In this journey of life, do you define your journey or does the journey define you ?

Your life, your choices, your thoughts are molded by what you see and what you learn.

Parents, Guardians, surrounding  etc. play a major role in molding your thoughts as kids and imprinting basic values of life, wellbeing, honesty and other virtues. Sometimes, parents can impose  or nudge you towards a path. Good parents, mostly have good intentions and guide kids towards a better path and life. This also puts you towards a better journey.

 As adult, you choose how you will be and what you want to be as a person. You are free to choose and define your life, morals and the person you want to be.

If you are fortunate and free, you can choose the path you can go on. You can choose to do the right thing, be honest and just . This will be your path for choosing. 

When you walk down a path, there are many unknowns . There can be both good and bad surprises, which will change your way of life.

So YES, if you are fortunate to live in a free world, have had good parents , guardian or mentors who guided you well, you choose your journey and how the journey goes, will mold you to be the person you would be.

But that is not always the case. Sometimes, you are not free to make your own choices. 

For example, this is not true for children who are forced to participate in WAR or kidnapped to be slaves or part of organized crimes. There is no choice in that life. Its imposed on you. 

The journey imposed on you is harsh and full of misfortunes . If someone is fortunate to find a good mentor or guide, their life can change for better and put them on a better path .

Be aware of your blessings and know, what you are today is because of your parents, guides, mentors, virtues taught to you and your self . Choose your path wisely.

We should not be judgmental about less fortunate beings, who lead a different path. For those, it was not of their own choosing or they were not guided or taught well to choose the correct one. Be empathetic with these souls and help them get back on the right path.

You can volunteer at your school or homeless shelter. If you cant directly help or be involved, you can contribute to those organizations who do. Do what you can do. 

Be good, kind and empathetic to all, for you don't know what others have been or going through in life. 

                                                                                                                        

Do you think something or someone is GOOD or BAD ? Depends where you start

Do you think something or someone is bad or good, depends on how you start evaluating .

If you start on a positive note, considering that its good, than you will see all good things in that person or concept. Your list of good things will be much longer than the list of bad , which you usually tend to overlook . Its difficult to shake that positive thought.

If you start with the negative thought about something or someone, you start highlighting all the negative aspects and your negative list is bigger and all the positives are overlooked. You started with bad and after quick evaluation, ended up with worst thought for that person or thing or concept.

So where should you start ?

If you have positive thought, start by considering that its a negative thing or person and see if you can find and highlight all the negative aspects . Later you can evaluate for yourself if you still think, the positives are more to overlook all negative .

Similar way, if you have negative outlook for someone or something, start your evaluation with the positive bias and see if you can find all positive aspects and later evaluate if your list of positives is still lower than your previous negative outlook . 

You might change your mind , from what you were thinking previously.

Everybody has the great - What if question !!!

Many times in our life, we have the What-if question, about decisions we made or something that didn't happen or that old girlfriend that we didn't connect with, etc. etc.

What didn't happen, we can only guess at this time, as to what it would had been, ad it would be only a guess and things could had turned out either good or very bad. Remember that you took that decision, at time in past for a reason or some circumstance .

Look at your life Now. Do you feel your life is good now ? 

If your Answer is YES , be thankful that your life has turned out very good , even tough you had missed on certain things or people in life. It is much better now, for sure . It might had turned out to be not so good, had those past events happened in your life, and your life would had taken altogether different turn and it would be a different life you would be leading now.

So stop worrying about your past decisions and feel blessed for a happy life you have NOW.

If you are worrying about a What-If question in present, than just go and ask for it. Ask for that raise you feel you deserve OR Ask that girl out that you had been waiting for a long time , at worst you will get a NO answer, nothing to loose in that. In future, you can say, hey at least I tried. The What-If feeling is worst, if you don't even try. The outcomes can vary, which is not something you control. 

Outcomes of anything we do or any action we take, is result of so many secondary events that its difficult to guess the exact outcome. We can only guess the probabilities. So if you have guessed probability of a positive event of being high, go for it for sure. Sometimes your positive guess, might not agree with the outcome you get, that does not mean you were wrong, it just means that the secondary influencing factors made the outcome different from what you were expecting.

So take a step back and reevaluate your assumptions and you might learn something new. If your assumptions are still positive, keep working on it and the outcome will turn out to be positive. it might just take few more attempts. People sometimes call this Luck or hand of god etc. So keep that light lighted and don't let it go. Things will eventually happen. In past it was called a prophecy . So its  a prophecy that you will SUCCEED . Don't let those positive thoughts die. Keep working on it. You are bound to get the results. 

Do you blame others for your misfortune ?

Do you blame others for the misfortunes in your life ?

Let's see !!

Do you let others make decisions for you or have your relied on others to help you with your 

decisions ? 

Do you feel you can't make those decisions by yourself and always your parents or siblings or

friends to help out ?

Well, if you are one of the above, then you should not be crying and blaming others anyway.

If you don’t have courage to make your own decisions also, than what's the point.

Next time if you feel like  blaming somebody, blame yourself for not having the courage to take 

your own decision and stop whining . Having the freedom to make your own decision is the

true freedom you have got. So use that.

If you are the kind of person who takes his/her own decisions, congratulations !!

You have done something right to start.

If things did not work out the way they should , you are fully responsible for them.

 It's OK to screw up or get screwed .

Get up, dust off the mishaps and move on in life.

Learn from the mistakes , on how to avoid such happenings in future or how to minimize the 

damage if it happens again.

It's OK to hear out what others have to say, but remember , you are the boss and you are 

ultimately responsible for your own actions. So assimilate everything and make the best decision.

Consider the what-if scenarios, if the tide goes against you and work out a plan to minimize the damage.

Murphy's law always applies : Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.

That doesn’t mean you should sit tight and do nothing.

This world is ruled by random events , so don't be hard on yourself . Read this article, it might make few things clear : Is there a God or this world is totally Random ?

Go on make great decisions and make this world a better place for yourself and others.